The Bionic Sound Project

this girl’s journey to sound

In a comment to a friend regarding a controversial magazine article about CIs at school Monday, January 26, 2004

I would like to get the CI (and we’re figuring that out right now if I’m eligible or not), but the problem is that I do too well with my hearing aids.

Recently (I’m not done with the hearing test/evaluation yet), I got 19/20 right in the sound field test on BOTH ears.

So, with a 95 and 110 dB loss in both ears, but a functioning capacity between 30 to 50 dB (I forgot exactly what), I can hear just about everything, but I don’t always understand what I’m hearing (the words, unless if I’m looking at the person). And then again, it depends on who I’m talking to (i.e. my mom, I can have a simple conversation with her without looking at her or on the phone.)

But the one thing I want, is a better guarantee or prediction that it will work. That I won’t revert to a state of hearing that was worse than it is now by getting the implant. At the same time, I have the auditory training, skills, and the capabilities to be a successful implant candidate. It’s the cutoff and my current abilities that’s the problem. As I said, I’m still in the middle of testing, so I’ll have to update you about that later.


How Much I Love Music Tuesday, January 13, 2004

Filed under: creative,deaf,feelings,listening,music — Allison @ 8:33 pm

And this is one of those moments where I realize how much I really *LOVE* music.

And how much of an influence it has on my life.

I like the way the words, the melody, the rhythm, the lyrics, how it all comes together.

I like
…the banging of the drums in the background, the sizzling sounds of the synthesizer, the the pure tones of the piano and the dings and rings of the high-pitched instruments.

…how the music goes from the highs and the lows. The building up of the tension, the release.  The crescendos and the diminuetos. The changing age of machines coming up with more and more complicated backbeats, rhythms, and drum patterns.

…how the singers wrap their voices around the words, making them soft as silk, smooth as velvet, rough like a rock, scratchy like a needle on a record, or as golden as the voices of angels. They can scat sing, beatbox, rap, screech, and imitate, or just make sounds. And all the voices rise together in harmony… making the purest sound… a togetherness, an intimacy of its own kind.

…how so many different sounds, even everyday sounds can be incorporated into music. It doesn’t have to be fancy, an official instrument, as long as it makes noise.

…how one note, one melody, one section of the music can just jump up and grab you and your attention. It just makes you sit up and pay attention.

…how that one note hits a sweet spot deep down inside you.

Just about anything you can think of, can be made into music. (well, there are some exceptions, but bear with me here.)

Listening to music makes me feel so alive, so inspired, so uplifted (especially when it’s good music)

If you close your eyes, you are taken on a journey, the highs and lows of the hills, climbing the mountains of the crescendos, keeping up with the beat of the music, the pulse of the life, and the ideas come, and they keep on coming. It doesn’t have to be words, it can be an image.

I can’t express it in words. I can only feel it. And I want you to feel it with me. My soul cries out for the kindred spirit to tap into my energy and take the feeling that I get from the music.

I never ever want to lose my music. It is my life. It is my blood. It is one thing that keeps me alive.

Even though I’m deaf, I don’t let it stop me. It is my passion. I embrace and welcome it with open arms.


I got my earmolds today, yay! Monday, January 12, 2004

Filed under: hearing aids — Allison @ 4:54 pm

I got my new earmolds today!

whee! now I can hear so much better.

reminder to self: don’t wait that long before getting new earmolds.

My old ones look ancient. They look like they belong in a history museum…lol. That’s considering that I’ve worn them for a year, if not more. Oy vey!